The Rights of Parents
The rights of parents include respect, love and obedience.
This obedience is conditional that it does not contradict obedience to the commands of Allah and His Messenger. It involves care and kindness to both parents, and provision of necessities for elder parents. Humility and respect to both parents equally is an obligation, and any arrogance or insolence is forbidden. Patience and perseverance is required when serving parents, no matter what the circumstances.
Allah says in the verse of the Glorious Qur’an: And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to your parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them.and address them with good words. (17:23)
The Messenger of Allah ( instructed us saying: .Allah.s Pleasure (on someone) is based on the pleasure of his parent. The Wrath of Allah is based upon the anger of his parent.. 50
Both parents are entitled for such right even if they are not Muslims so long as they do not command their children to do any act of disobedience to Allah . Aishah -the wife of the Prophet (- said: .My mother came to visit me while still not a Muslim. I asked Allah.s Prophet ( concerning her visit (and how to treat her while visiting me) and said, My mother is eager to visit with me. Should I (or should I not) extend my courtesy (as a host) to her? He ( said: .Yes, extend courtesy.. 50 Tirmidthi, Hadith No. 1962.
Human Rights in Islam and Common Misconceptions The mother must be given priority in terms of kindness, sympathy, good feelings, love and affection as mentioned by Allah.s Prophet (: .A man came to Allah.s Prophet ( and asked him, .O Prophet of Allah! Who is the most worthy and deserving person of my good treatment and companionship?
He ( replied, .Your mother.. The man asked, .who is next worthy person of my companionship?. Allah.s Messenger replied, .your mother.. The man asked . who is next?. Allah.s Messenger replied, .your mother.. The man asked .who is next?. Allah.s Messenger replied, .your father.. And in another version there is the ending:..your father, and then the next nearest and next nearest..51
Allah.s Messenger ( assigned the mother with a three-fold portion of the right of companionship. The father, in comparison, receives only one share. This is due to the fact that mothers suffer more hardships during pregnancy and in the birth, delivery and care of the children. Allah says in the Glorious Qur’an:
And we have enjoined on man kindness to his parents: in pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth. (46:15)
This in no way demeans the rights of the father, since the Prophet ( said:
“No son can repay (the right of his father) unless he finds him a slave, buys him and then emancipates him.” 52 51 Bukhari Hadith No. 2227, Muslim Hadith No. 2584 and Tirmidthi, Hadith No. 1959. 52 Reported by Muslim
Human Rights in Islam and Common Misconceptions The Rights of Husband towards His Wife
A husband has the right of ultimate authority of the home management since he is responsible for them and is accountable for all aspects of their maintenance. His leadership should be with justice, patience and wisdom. As Allah says in the Glorious Qur’an:
Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. (4:34)
One reason among many for this degree of responsibility is that men are generally stronger and rational whereas women are generally weaker and more emotional, traits given by their Creator to serve their complementary roles in life and in the family. A wife is required to obey the commands and instructions of her husband as long as these do not involve any act of disobedience to Allah.s command and the Prophet.s instructions. Aishah, the wife of the Prophet ( questioned him:
Whose right is the greatest on a woman? He ( replied spontaneously, .A woman.s husband.s.. The Messenger ( was asked: .whose right is the greatest on a man? . He ( replied, .His mother.s.. A wife must not demand from her husband things that he cannot afford, that he is not capable to produce, or tasks beyond his ability. A wife is required to protect the children and the lineage of her husband by protecting herself and being completely chaste. She should be a trustworthy guardian of his wealth. She should not leave her husband.s home without his 53 Al-Hakem.
Human Rights in Islam and Common Misconceptions prior knowledge and approval, nor allow any person to enter in his home whom her husband dislikes. This is to protect the honor and harmony of the family, as instructed by the Messenger of Allah :
The best of women is the one, who, if you look at her you will be pleased with her, if you command her [to perform any lawful action] she will obey you, and if you are absent she will protect and preserve your wealth and lineage..54